So I wanna be a rock star

Yesterday's master class* was an unusually tough critique.  Honestly, if you think my voice sucks that much could you possibly have mentioned it some other time in the past 8 months?

Talking with my teacher afterwards: "Well, you did a lot of things right, and it's not as bad as they made it sound.  Why does it matter if people don't like the sound of your voice?  You've always said you want to be a teacher, not a performer."

No one sane puts their entire life into something, and doesn't hope (a least a little) to do something big with that effort.  I've always hoped that I could beat the odds, and if not be well known, at least achieve something more than singing in the chorus of a smaller opera company in STL.  

It's difficult to face the music.  I'm too old to play with the big kids. (all the famous opera singers you know of were already well known at 30, not just starting school)  Although I wouldn't mind the travel, Dan probably wants to see me occasionally, and living in O'Fallon isn't going to help establish a career where I work everyplace but "home."

I can teach any subject I understand ('cause I've already done it), and honestly, having a performance career is wildly unstable, both financially and emotionally.  And some of the most famous singers can't teach, by their own admission.  Most musical prodigies are poor teachers, because they never had to learn in the first place.  (weak analogy, but run with it.)

So, being a teacher is just as important as being famous, maybe more so.  By teaching, I will influence more lives, even provide a legacy that lives on.  Maybe I'll set up my own music school some day, and re-popularize a different (IMHO better) system for vocal instruction.

But still... everybody wants to be a rock star.

* Master Class:  you perform, in front of the entire department, a mostly prepared piece, and all the teachers *except your own* make verbal comments/suggestions.  Participation is mandatory.